journal #26

October 8,2012

Jennifer is a transfer student in her sophomore year in high school. By November, she had made some good friends through her soccer team and her classes, but still felt on the outside of the more popular students. She has a great relationship with her parents, and trusts their advice to just give it time.
The first weekend of Thanksgiving break, rumors started that a blow out party was happening at a sophomore girl’s house while the parents were out of town. Jennifer didn’t know the girl well but she was one of the most popular girls in the class and most of the upperclassmen were planning on attending, as well. One of the hottest junior guys had already asked her if she would be there. Everyone was saying this was going to be the best party of the year. This seemed like the perfect opportunity to break out of her small clique and hang out with the students everyone always talked about.

Her dilemma was that there was no way her parents would let her go to this party if they knew the parents were out of town, and she wanted to go very badly. Jennifer had rarely lied to her parents and never about anything big. She knew her parents trusted her and that made it even harder to lie to them. Because they respected her, she hated the times when she felt like she was letting them down.
Her friends told her to just not say anything and only lie if her parents directly asked her about adults being at the party. Easy enough for
them to say, but her friends weren’t as tight with their parents as she was with hers. She felt that if she just went to this one party her social standing at school could be a lot different. She would get to know more students, she’d be seen as someone they can party with, and she wouldn’t be so shy about approaching the more popular students anymore.

Would it be worth it to hide the facts of the party from her parents and risk having to lie? And if they found out about the party, could she deal with the fact that they probably wouldn’t trust her anymore? On the other hand, everyone lies to his or her parents eventually. And if they never found out, what would it really matter?

What would you do?

What do you think your parents would do if you told them about the party?
Have you or someone you know ever been in a similar situation? What happened?

What do you do when you are faced with a situation where there doesn’t seem to be a “good choice”?

Who do you have in your life (besides your parents) that you might go to if you were faced with this problem?

(Use empathize)

I think I would lie to my parents because if they really trusted me, they would let me go to the party even if the parents weren’t going to be there. If they really did trust me, they would trust me enough to know that I wont do anything I shouldn’t do. If my parents found out I lied to them about the parents being at the party, they would have trouble trusting me again when I tell them where I wanted to go out. They wouldn’t let me go out for a while after they found out I lied to them. My parents will not empathize on my punishment.
My sister has been in this situation before, she did lie to my parents about who was going to be at the party, the good things was that my parents never found out about the party. When I am faced with a situation that I know I shouldn’t be doing, I go ahead and do it because when I am older I wont be able to do the things I can do now. And when I’m older I can look back and say I lived a good life and have no regrets.
If I had this problem I would go to my older cousin, because she will not tell my parents anything but she will tell me what the right thing to do is, and if it
is worth it or not, and she has been through those type of situations that she can give me advice by experience. Advice that I can trust, and follow.